Does Parenting Style Matter In Raising Kids?


Being a parent can be both wonderful and challenging. Raising children is considered to be one of the noblest jobs anyone could do since the responsibilities it entails are hard to perform. However, everyone has their take on how they perform their jobs, even how parents raise their kids.

Although parents have their styles of raising children, there have been commonalities observed among these styles, with each different producing outcomes on children as they grow up.


Baumrind 4 Types Of Parenting Style 

In the 1960s, Diane Baumrind created the most cited categorization of parenting styles. The Baumrind Parenting Styles categorizes parenting into four types: Authoritative Parenting, Authoritarian Parenting, Uninvolved Parenting, and Permissive Parenting.


These parenting styles were categorized after identifying the different dimensions involved in parenting, which are disciplinary strategies, warmth and nurturing, communication styles, and expectations.

Historically, being a parent was something you just were. If you had kids, you were a parent and if you didn’t, well, you weren’t. It was a noun, plain and simple. — Mike Brooks Ph.D.

  • Authoritarian Parenting

Being an authoritarian parent equates to being a disciplinarian. Most parents who use this kind of parenting have a strict style, often dismissing the idea of negotiation. They are also known to use punishment whenever a child does not comply with their set of rules, and often, these rules are not explained.


Communication is off the table, and high expectations are set without consultation. Parents whose children were raised with this style often are obedient. However, they are said to rank lower in happiness, self-esteem, and social competence.


  • Authoritative Parenting

Contrary to Authoritarian Parenting, being an Authoritative parent offers rules and expectations to their children with clear and valid reasons. They are reasonable with their disciplinary regulations and are also nurturing to their kids.


Communication is also highly valued, and children’s opinions on the goals set are considered. The children who lived in a household with this parenting style are said to be happy, capable, and successful.


  • Permissive Parenting

Parents who are permissive have limited guidance on their kids. They often act as friends to their children and let them do what they want. Communication is also very open, but they let their children decide on their own. They are warm and nurturing as well, and they do not set expectations.


If they do set expectations, however, these are said to be minimal. Although parents are said to be nurturing in this kind of setting, children whose parents are permissive are often those who struggle with self-regulation and authority. Thus, they also tend to perform poorly in academics.


  • Uninvolved Parenting

Uninvolved parents offer total freedom to their children. Whether it is a conscious decision to do so, or merely because they are clueless, these parents are often indifferent when it comes to their children.


Communication is very limited, and little nurturing is offered. Expectations or goals for their children are also few or none at all. Children who come from a household with this parenting style rank the lowest among the four parenting styles, simply because they have low self-esteem, they lack self-control and also perform poorly compared to others their age.

You might worry your child will have the same negative experiences you did. This anxiety, not a desire to avoid parenting responsibilities, may lead to emotional shutdown and withdrawal. — Ben Ringler, MFT

What Is The Perfect Parenting Style?

These categories only serve as distinctions on how parents treat their children. No parent only possesses one type of parenting style. Think of it as a broad spectrum wherein parents’ styles and ways overlap with one another.


Sometimes, parents can be completely uninvolved, or sometimes, parents can be downright authoritative figures. Perhaps, the question would be at what point in a child’s development should a parent be extra careful with their ways.


Although authoritative parenting is shown to yield the best results among the other types, the reality is that there is no perfect parent, nor there is a perfect parenting style. Being a parent is all about compromise and sacrifices; showing that you can be there for your kids. At the same time, you still have to instill discipline and respect with a sense of rationality.

To be honest, there is no such thing as a “perfect parent.” It’s a myth like a unicorn or dragon. — R. Y. Langham, Ph.D.

The bottom line, you cannot fully dictate or determine what your kids will become, as a parent you can only guide them and lead them to the right path.